Gaman and Giri

I was reading a post from someone who was a big part of my teenage years. I go to his site occassionaly to see what new and exciting things are happening in his life. Only this time he wrote of a man he had the priviledge of listening to at a conference he attended in Boston.

He said that during this particular speech two things stuck out more than anything he heard. In fact he said that he hopes he can hand them down to his boys as they get older. I hope he doesn't mind that I am copying and pasting some of what he wrote on to my blog. We can share, can't we Doug?

So here it is:

One of the featured speakers at the conference in Boston was Fred Hoshiyama. Fred is a YMCA legend with an unbelievable life story - from his time in the American Internment camps set up for the Japanese (where he and his family of 7 lived in horse stall), to opening the Japanese YMCA in San Francisco to everyone, not just Japanese Americans., He studied at Yale divinity school, received his Masters degree, has raised a family and fought prostate cancer. He volunteers his time to travel around the country encouraging YMCA staff by sharing his life-story, which has included the YMCA since basically his birth. And on top of all this he is 93 and sharp as a tack.
I've heard him speak before, but this time I picked up 2 things that I hope to keep with me and hand down to my children. He shared that his mother sacrificed much to raise him and his 5 other brothers and sisters, since his father had passed away while Fred was just a young child. He also said that he remembered 2 things she taught him. One was Gaman. He said that it is hard to literally translate from Japanese, but basically it means suck it up and hope for a better tomorrow. Hearing a 93 year old say "suck it up" caused the group to burst into laughter! There are many times in life that are tough - they just plain suck. So we gaman. We suck it up and hope that tomorrow will be a better day. I like that it isn't just saying to "toughen up, buttercup," but it also encourages us to hope.
The second idea was that of Giri - when you owe a debt, you must cheerfully repay it. The conditions in the internment camps were terrible - fenced, surrounded with barbed wire, with nothing for the children to do. So Fred went up to a guard and asked to make a phone call. Within 2 days, YMCA members from San Francisco brought out toys and games and sports equipment. His mother explained to him and his brothers and sisters that they had been given a great gift and they must find a way to giri.
So remember, when things are tough, and roads seem to dead-end, and the sky is dark . . . gaman. The sun will come out again - guaranteed.
And those to whom much is given - giri. We have all be blessed in so many ways, and we need to show thanks for those blessings by giving our time, talents, and treasures to those less fortunate.

If you have read my blog you know that I have been having a hard time over the last month with Jacob. If ever God was to challenge me, it clearly is now. Things are starting to pick up and I am hopeful, finally. I don't cry as much but instead smile a lot more. I don't raise my voice as much but tell Jacob in a nice calm way that what he is doing or how he is speaking to me is unacceptable. It's funny (not haha) but I think it is bothering him that he isn't getting to me anymore! Finally a 5 year old hasn't broken me! I feel like shouting everyday GAMAN!!!! I have hope that there will be sunny skies tomorrow. Kinda feels like the production of Annie I played in, in the 1st grade!

Jacob started fresh today at school. I had his teacher changed and Mrs. Brinkley came to be there if he needed her. The cool thing is that she didn't go in the class but instead just kept popping her head to see if he needed her. He didn't need her. His new teacher said that she had to speak to him a couple of times but that was it. I didn't get any phone calls or emails or notes home. In fact he said that he had a "green" day. In kindergarten terms that means he had a great day!

It is going to take time, lots of time but as long as we all just work together he will make it.